My husband Nic and I (and big brother Sebastien) are excited to announce that we are expecting our second child, due in May!
I’ve been holding this news in since early September, but this time around it’s been a bit different emotionally for me, so for peace of mind, I wanted to wait until the 20 week anatomy scan. Thankfully, everything seems to be going well and I’m feeling great now that I’m at the halfway point.
I am also very happy to have passed the first trimester where I was suffering from constant nausea and extreme fatigue, just like when I was pregnant with Sebastien. The difference is, last time I was working full-time while trying to battle through it (as well as keeping it a secret, which is difficult when you’re constantly scanning rooms for garbage cans to potentially hover over.)
As hard as that was back then, battling nausea and exhaustion was actually more of a challenge this time while keeping up with a toddler! I put on way too many episodes of Paw Patrol (in order to get time to lay on the couch) than I’d like to admit. I had a lot of days filled with so much mom guilt in the beginning.
At least this time I knew everything was temporary.
When I was pregnant with Sebastien, I remember laying in bed feeling so sick worrying that it would never end. I recall someone assuring me I would feel much better by 12 weeks (Lies… I still vomited at 15 weeks) but that milestone felt forever away. This time, even though I knew it would be rough for two to three months, I also knew from experience that it would pass me by in the blink of an eye, as every day has since becoming a mom.
Now, at nearly 21 weeks, I still have some nausea, but it’s only once daily and it’s much more manageable. The extreme fatigue has also settled down immensely (and yes, I am fully aware I will feel the exhaustion again once I’m officially a mom of two — a toddler and a newborn.)
Although, I’ve had some new ‘glamorous’ pregnancy side effects pop up that I never had previously… including body acne, broken facial capillaries, and sciatic nerve pain randomly shooting from my lower spine down my legs. How lovely! Thankfully, nothing serious and hopefully all temporary. With the sciatica, my doctor’s exact words were, “Welcome to a second pregnancy!” (I guess it’s common) and referred me to physiotherapist. I’ve been doing my daily strengthening exercises and rocking a super sexy maternity belt ever since. I’m not complaining though.
I know from experience that it’s worth every ache, pain, and body image insecurity.
I’ve also been way more emotional this time around. I’m not usually the type of person who cries when I’m sad, unless it’s truly awful. I’m more likely to cry tears of joy, usually thanks to an Ellen giveaway, a sappy movie moment, or the first time my son said to me, “Mama beautiful.” I only really cried over major work stresses in my first pregnancy, but this pregnancy, I’ve been an emotional wreck over nothing.
For example, one morning all I wanted for breakfast was peanut butter on toast but we were out of peanut butter. Nic said he would go out to grab some after he finished up some work that would take him about half an hour. Not a big deal normally, but pregnant?? I covered my face with a pillow and silently sobbed until I finally got to eat my PB on toast, which is embarrassing to admit and so not like me. Even my two-year-old son was like, “What are you, two?”
I don’t even know how my husband put up with me during basically September through November.
I’m so grateful for him. He would often take our son on an outing so I could nap. He would clean the entire house when I had no energy to move, even if I barely moved all day. He would make me a separate meal after I would inform him that my new food aversion of the day was exactly what he just made me. Plus, I was just straight up bitchy a lot. I did a lot of apologizing and thanking him for his patience, as I’m sure he was wondering where the hell his wife went and who this irritable, crazy lady was in my place. Even I was wondering when I would feel more like myself. No wonder pregnancy can put a strain on marriages, it can get rough when one of you is growing a human being!
The most surprising difference to me is how the things I worried about in my last pregnancy are completely different this time around. Last time I was way more paranoid about what I ate, and I spent a lot of energy worrying about work. This time, I’m definitely still aware and cautious about what I put in body, but way more relaxed, and I have zero work stress since I haven’t been on the air for two years. So in that sense, it’s been easier. However…
I’m constantly trying to remind myself to not to worry about what I can’t control.
Especially when it comes to testing, scans, baby’s development, checkups, etc. I have driven myself crazy between 4 week appointments just waiting to hear the heartbeat again, so nervous that something has gone wrong. I swear I felt the baby flutters early on, but then I didn’t feel anything for a few weeks at one point and I was so anxious until I saw my doctor again. Hearing that heartbeat is the best reassurance. (And as of recently, finally feeling the baby move daily. I think we have a gymnast in there!)
I had a few weeks of intense anxiety creep up on me a few times postpartum previously, so while these feelings are new to me in pregnancy, they’re not new in general.
Needless to say, I wanted to see baby again in the 20 week ultrasound before officially announcing. With Sebastien, we didn’t find out the sex during that anatomy scan, but this time we did. Yes, we know what we’re having! And I will share that in my next blog… 🙂
xo – Bri